In Sickness and in Health

Everything that has a beginning has an ending.

Everything we gain we lose.

Every joy is eventually matched with its corresponding sorrow.

Why do find it so hard to accept this?

Why do not grow up learning that this is life, in its richest and fullest and deepest richness.

It’s not just we mere mortals, it’s our cultures, it’s the mountains, it’s our sun, it’s our galaxy, perhaps even our universe

and perhaps even space and time and existence itself flashes in and out of existence…. it certainly does at the quantum level.

So as we witness our self destruction let us paradoxically accept what we are losing but accept that something new and unexpected and perhaps beautifully wondered will be born. For as the poets tell us ending are just beginnings for something mysterious, and I love a good mystery. So what can we do? Let go of BAU [business as usual] and help the new mystery be born. To put you into this poetic mood I wrote you a poem; perhaps it will help you let go of some of your rationality and jump into the cold October lake that life has to offer us this Thanksgiving weekend. I for one am going to jump into the lake at our family cottage knowing that it is a totally unreasonable act, especially at my age, but an act like life itself, an act that is and ending and a beginning. So let’s not focus on what is ending and what is wrong, let’s let it all go, we have lost a lot but there is even more to gain – but ONLY if we let go of the old ways.

In Sickness and in Health

Once upon a time

we were all young

and foolish

and loving it.

We were told that being young was the greatest gift of all

And understood not a word of what the wizened old man was mumbling to us.

We were ignorant: what a gift! Ignorance really is bliss.

Honestly if I knew how much

of life is a giant roller coaster

going up to beautiful highs nearing heaven

laughter and beauty and bliss

followed by descents diving into the abyss

of pain and despair and death all around

I might not have repeated the words of my wedding vow

so glibly as I repeated:

for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health,

to love and to cherish, till death do us part.

They were just words back then

Not to be taken seriously.

Well, Father Time has rolled along

Steamrolling underneath him many dear friends and aunts and uncles and cousins.

But I’m not here to complain

because truth be told those gorgeous moments where we soared near heaven

those sunsets so full of colour that we knew that an Artist was at work

those hugs from dear friends who we had helped through a hard moment

the sheer joy of riding a bicycle with our children who felt the freedom of the road for very first time

The first kiss when we melted into another

and knew that living alone was now impossible

All those bits of heaven have helped me accept that

in sickness and inhealth

is the journey we all take

And this journey that is the greatest gift of all.